Sooooo Tiny

My mom says I need to go on a diet.

First, what's a diet?

Second, do you see how tiny my legs and feet are? Soooooo tiny. What is this 'chubby' they keep mentioning? That round little pouch there is just my fluffy fur. It's just fluff!! Everyone likes fluff. Especially marshmallow fluff. Mmm. Marshmallows.


Katie saw me showing the mamas my cute toes, so she had to show off and do her double-crossed move. Show off. I don't see any tummy fluff on HER.

Anyway. When's dinner?

Dear Mama

Dear Mama:

Yesterday when I told you over and over and over and over that I needed food, I did not mean canned food. The fact that the canned food you placed in front of me did not even register, shoudl have told you something was up.

Do you think canned food helps me maintain this gorgeous belly? No. It's all dry food, mama.

Sometimes I think you just don't hear me.

Love,
Tiger Lily

Hello!

Hi.

Me again. Just reminding you that it's almost time for dinner. In fact, it IS time for dinner.

C'mon, let's go.

And don't you dare call me Lassie.

A Living Cliche

I had such a big day today.

• While Cleo woke up the mommies, I slept on the couch.
• I inhaled my breakfast.
• Three hours later, I cried piteously and incessantly for more food.
• Mommies are mean.
• I fell asleep on the couch.
• For six hours.
• Nothing on TV.
• More sleeping.

Who says cats don't do anything but sleep all day? What? I ate.

Paw Of Death

So the mama who does not feed me? The one who is home all the time? Tonight I did some TALKING. About who is BOSS around here. She was washing dishes, and I sneaked up and and and and I swatted her ANKLE.

And then I fell down, and I forgot all about it.

Introduction

Hi, I'm Tiger Lily.

I'm a black-and-white kitty who lives in a nice apartment in Alameda, California.

What I like to do, is eat.

My moms never give me enough food. I yell, I cry, I beg.

There is never enough food.

This is the story of my life.